Houston, We Have a Name!

This whole baby naming thing is serious business! I mean, we're basically setting the stage for a lifetime. We didn't want it to be a here-today-gone-tomorrow moniker, didn't want it to sound like a name of yesteryear, but also didn't want it to be a top 10 everyone-has-it kind of name. Still on the "didn't want" list... something too juvenile or silly for an adult male.

I'll shorten the wait... this l'il guy will be named:

Caleb Ian

Here are the facts:

Caleb - Arabic origin meaning bold, brave

Ian - Irish origin meaning "God's gracious gift"

Iterations we seriously considered included Ian Kenneth (my grandpa and Paul's foster grandpa was/is Kenneth), Caleb Kenneth and Caleb Bryce.

If Caleb were a girl, his name would have been Lila Colbie. Incidentally, I had Lilah picked out for a girl's name years ago, and Paul's grandma's name is Lila (no "h" at the end)... so that was a no-brainer for us.

We were pretty sure Ian would be mispronounced by too many as "Eye-An" - and after a life of "Joan" instead of "Jo-Ann" for me, I don't want my kid to have to correct people so often. (Side rant: nobody else in my family has that problem! Who mispronounces Jay, Judy, Karen, or Daniel??!)

It was also thought that Ian would certainly become "peein' Ian" at some point on the playground, so we tried to stay away from that. On the other hand, Caleb could become "Gay-leb", but with all the popular Aiden ("Gay-den") and Kaiden (again, "Gay-den") names right now, maybe that'll just be too common to be funny.

We've yelled it several times in the house to make sure it flows when he's in trouble. Sounds good when we're fake mad!

Finally, if you say his first and middle name scrunched together, it sounds like a drunk person saying Caribbean. Try it :)

Stupid Sayings

I really don't like that whole "things happen for a reason" saying. Yes, yes, yes, it's all part of a bigger plan that I am too pea-minded to understand and too much a simpleton to possibly grasp.

"It was [or wasn't] meant to be." Profound. Not.

To people who say "just relax": please provide your script to me for the Xanax, Percocet or Valium you're taking. When you take the good stuff, you must share.

Alas, I've actually heard these exact and most annoying phrases leaping from my own mouth. I try to push the words back in as I realize they're making their debut... but my foot follows too slowly. I hate that!

Where did October go?

We are officially 24 weeks today! How did we get this far so fast? Where did October go? Rhetorical question since I know where it went: I dedicated the month to my job, of course. Work has been hellish busy and stressful lately, and I can't help but think how different my schedule - my availability - will be after the baby is here. There will be no 12-16 hour days on a regular basis.

Sorry, Job. I know I set a kid-less precedent for 11 years. I put in lots of time, worked crazy hours, and did pretty much anything you asked of me. Now, it's time for me to move on to bigger and better things. I hope you support me in my big transition like I've supported you for the last decade!

Thinking Baby's Room

Let me start by saying Paul is the artistic (not autistic - that's me and an entirely different non-existent blog) one in our marriage. I like crafting, but wouldn't call myself particularly artsy. So when talking about the baby's room (that is now his office and our storage room/guest room) this afternoon's banter went something like:

Me: Have you thought more about what you want to do in the nursery?
Him: Yes
Me: Willing to share?
Him: I was thinking about a 3D design with a supporting mural (not his words, but that was the idea)
Me: 3D huh?
Him: [explains things that are more than just paint on the wall]
Me: So you would do the building and enlist my mom's help for some sewing? Hmmm. That sounds interesting honey. [<<< that's me being supportive!]
Him: It would be totally easy
Me: [laughing on the inside, thinking about Tim Allen's character on Home Improvement, knowing he'll certainly go above and beyond] Ok. Hey, just wondering, who will dust it?
Him: What?
Me: Yeah, 3D stuff sticks out so it will inevitably collect dust. I was just wondering who was going to clean it.
Him: [funny cute smile that said "Hey, I'm just thinking about making this room bad-ass. That's a different problem entirely!"] Ummmmmmm....

I can't wait for mid-December to be here. Paul will be done with school and we can start working on the room. I'm not even sure I want to decorate the house inside or out for Christmas... seems like that will take precious time away from our time to focus on getting ready for Baby. After all, I'll be leaving for Northern CA in the beginning of February and he'll be following shortly after so we'll only have 6-7 weeks to pull it all together. Plenty of time if you don't factor in Christmas and New Year's crappola. Excited nonetheless!

I Hope It's A...

I was reading the news this morning and saw that some famous person is pregnant with her second child. I got to the part where she said "I hope it's a girl this time" and just stopped reading. Does anyone understand how heavy that falls on the ears of people who are just hoping for a healthy baby, regardless of gender? I get it, you want a boy and a girl. Be happy with what you're lucky enough to have and stop whining - at least within my earshot.

Milestones

As in any journey, there are many milestones in surrogacy. There's the day I started corresponding with our potential surrogate... the day we first spoke on the phone... the day we met her and her family... the day we considered ourselves matched and she became our surrogate instead of our potential surrogate. On the medical front, there are more milestones... her phone screening with our doctor, meeting him is person, medical exams, bloodwork, and psychological screening. Then there's the legal front... contract drafted, reviewed, modified and signed. Another major milestone - the date of embryo transfer. That sets off a chain of yet more events: positive pregnancy test, ultrasound for sac placement, ultrasound for heartbeat, and eventually getting to and past the first trimester. The last milestone for us was the big ultrasound at which we found out we're having a boy. That's a lot of progress marks along the way!

Today marks a major milestone in this pregnancy: we are starting our 20th week today - 20 weeks down, 20 to go. Time is playing a trick on me! Part of me thinks "we're already at 20 weeks?! how'd we get this far??" This is the part of me that is wondering how we'll get everything done that needs to be done in the 6-8 weeks between Paul finishing school and the baby's arrival. Oh yeah - and Christmas/New Year is in that same 6-8 weeks, so I'm pretty sure it's not going to be alllll baby. The other part of me thinks "we're only at 20 weeks? how can I speed this up?!" This is the impatient part of me... and if you ask Paul, that's a BIG part of me :) I just cannot wait to see him and meet him, even though he's a nameless little boy at this point. Naming him... perhaps that will be the next milestone.

Go Blue

... and I'm not talking about the Dodgers. It's a boy! We found out at the big ultrasound last Friday where the technician took a bazillion measurements and said he looked great and weighed approximately 7 to 8 ounces at this point. It was a completely emotional and surreal experience. With every day that passes, I think about our new reality. A boy!

It was a whirlwind weekend that began after Paul's class ended at 4:45 p.m. He wanted to miss the class altogether so we could leave earlier, but that wasn't an option. We hit the road immediately after he was done which was just in time for rush hour on Interstate 5. Good thing it was a Thursday because we weren't stuck in traffic for too long (LA traffic doesn't always suck... remember that!). Going up the 5 through CA is a stinky and boring trip. Stinky because of the beef ranches (hello, slaughterhouse) and boring (lots of farms and a few prisons - not much else). It took us 8 hours to get to Chico and checked into the hotel at 1 a.m. knowing the ultrasound appointment was for 8:45 a.m. - which meant getting up at 7:15 so we could both shower and get ready. Ugh! I know we'll get little to no sleep with the baby, but honestly, I'm good without "practice." Whoever thinks you need to practice sleep deprivation must be sleep deprived.

ANYWAY... we got to the scanning place, they took us back to the room, and they had a monitor for us to watch that was separate from the tech's screen. It was AMAZING! T and Paul pretty much knew what they were looking at. I could figure out the obvious parts (bent leg, thumbs up). The scale was just off though... first we'd be looking at the length of the spine from head to butt, then it'd be zoomed in on something. She measured lots of things and gave us the highlights... including gender (she'd asked us at the beginning if we wanted to know). She freezes a screen and asks "so what is it?" Paul and T say at the same time "it's a boy!" I'm still sitting there like "are we still looking at the leg or thumb or something?" I had a private ultrasound tutoring session afterwards with the still pictures the tech printed for us. Yes, now I can see... it's a boy!

The rest of the weekend went just as fast as it started. After the ultrasound on Friday, we went to T's house and played a couple games, met their oldest daughter (she'd been at her mom's the last time we were there), went out to dinner, then went back to the hotel so the kids could swim. Paul had to stay in the room and do homework... bummer. The next morning, we got up early to see a soccer game, check out some RV parks that I'll be staying at with Mom and Bill in February while we wait for the baby, and have a brunchy/lunch. We ended up leaving NorCal early afternoon and checking out another couple RV parks on the way south and then settled in for the 8 hour ride home. Oh wait... something memorable for Paul that I have to document here: we saw a Ghiradelli Chocolate OUTLET store and ice cream shop on the way up, so we had to stop there on the way back home. It's in the southern end of Modesto right on the 5. 'Twas chocolate heaven! We made it home by 11, got up the next morning to get the dogs from my Mom and Bill, came home so Paul could pack for a business trip, then took him to the airport. There was no 'down time' this past weekend... but who cares. We're having a healthy baby in February. And it's a boy.

The shot that proves it's a boy!

This pic is too cool - the spine! (head in lower right)

The leg, all bent and comfy!



Footprint :)